The Scariest Part of College Wasn’t the Classes — It Was My Roommates

How shared kitchens, messy dishes, and honest conversations turned strangers into lifelong friends

Adjusting to College Life: The Unexpected Fear

When I imagined going off to college, I expected to be nervous about classes, grades, or being far from home. But the absolute scariest part for me? My roommates. I spent the entire summer before move-in wondering who they were, where they were from, and — most importantly — if they were clean freaks or complete slobs. You know, the essential stuff.

A Few Things to Know About My Living Situation

Before I dive into the beautiful and occasionally horrifying details of having roommates, two things are worth noting:

1. I Went to College in England

2. There Was No Dining Hall

We didn’t have a cafeteria providing daily meals. I lived in a six-person suite, with my own room and bathroom, but a shared kitchen and common space. This meant that all six of us had to coordinate our meals and work together in the kitchen — a setup that sounds practical on paper but quickly becomes complicated in reality.

The First Test: Stocking the Shared Kitchen

The most important thing we learned early on was the need to clearly divide responsibilities when it came to furnishing and using our shared space.

Here’s what worked for us:

• Large appliances (like the microwave or toaster) were group purchases

• Smaller kitchenware — pots, pans, plates, and utensils — were brought or bought individually

• Groceries were mostly personal, with the occasional shared item

In theory, we had a system. But in practice, our individual items slowly became communal, and that’s when things got tricky.

When Sharing Goes Sideways

One of my roommates — who was also a teammate — loved to cook and bake. She spent a lot of time in the kitchen. I always told her she was welcome to use my cookware as long as she cleaned it afterward. But things didn’t go quite that smoothly. Dishes were left out for days. What started as a one-day delay in cleaning turned into a week and a half of crusted pans, stray utensils, and forgotten leftovers. The kitchen became a germaphobe’s worst nightmare. Eventually, we had to bring in our Resident Assistant (RA) to mediate before our passive tension turned into a full-blown conflict.

Cleaning Up the Conflict: Setting Boundaries

That confrontation forced an honest conversation between us — and later, with the rest of the suite. We talked through what mattered to each of us and how we could respect each other’s needs and space. We set rules, created a rotating chore chart, and tried to rebuild the dynamic before things got worse.It didn’t fix everything overnight, but it laid the groundwork for something better. Slowly, we learned how to coexist, communicate, and compromise.

From Roommates to Lifelong Friends

What started off as a stressful, chaotic living situation became something I never expected: a true friendship. Over time, the six of us grew closer. We didn’t just learn to tolerate each other — we learned to care about one another. Today, we still travel together and stay in touch, long after graduation.

What I Learned About Living With Roommates

Living with roommates in college will test your boundaries, your patience, and your ability to communicate. But it will also shape you in ways no class or lecture ever could.

Here are a few lessons I took with me:

• Set expectations early — don’t wait for conflict to surface

• Respect shared spaces and personal items

• Communicate clearly and directly

• Don’t be afraid to bring in help (your RA is there for a reason)

• With time and effort, even the messiest beginnings can lead to lasting friendships